If you’ve ever been to one of my flirting or pick up play classes (or, yanno, had any sort of conversation about those things with me) you’ve probably heard me say Fuck flirting. It’s not because I hate flirting (I’m actually a pretty big fan) – I just don’t think it’s the most efficient way to get the attention you want from the objects of your attraction; especially if what you want is a specific thing.
Here’s the deal. Flirting is a great way to see who you have that sparkly things called chemistry with. But it doesn’t tell you if the other person necessarily wants to act on that chemistry, or if they’re into the same things you’re into. Which is totally great when you’ve got time to sort that out, but significantly less great when you’re trolling the dungeon for for pick up play or hoping to hook up at a weekend event.
Plus at the end of the day, there are just too many ways that people can miss flirt clues that are put before them.
So what’s a more effective way to get that attention you want? Targeted marketing – work on attracting the attention of the group you most desire and let them come to you.
There are all sorts of ways to do this, either by casting a narrow net (like a personal ad in the message boards of a con you’re planning on attending) or casting a wide net (like flagging and seeing who bites). One of my favourite ways it to splash my interests right across my chest a la t-shirts; so when I came across the the other day, I really really wanted to share them with you.
- Down To Cuddle – Not so much with the DTF? This shirt has your back!
- Wanted: Cuddle Buddy – take things one step further and let people know you’re not just down for it, you’re looking for it.
- Tease and Denial fetish anyone?
- Ready to Mingle – I love this one because it doesn’t say single – non-mono ho!
- Single – Afraid some might think you’re unavailable?
- So Gay – No homo? pish – don’t even. So. Homo.
- I enjoy a good Spanking – ever worry you won’t find your fellow Spankos at a con? Never again.
Happy Hook ups!